Forget the Hummer… I Want the Marauder

It’s called “the Marauder”, and it’s the epitome of vehicular-awesomeness. What more could a man ask for in a tank truck?

Here’s some specs from Paramount Group:

Crew of 2 + 8
Payload 5 000kg
Various driveline, turret and weapon systems options
including 4×4 and 6×6 vehicle configurations
Air Burst
155mm High Explosive at 60m Azimeth 360 deg Elevation 0-30 deg
Ballistic Protection
7.62x54mm RB 32 API & .50cal API (Equivalent to STANAG 4569 level III)
Mine Protection
Mine Protection – Double anti-tank mine (14kg TNT) under any wheel. Single anti-mine (7kg) under the hull. (Higher than STANAG 4569 level 4a and 4b)#

When you’re behind the wheel of “the Marauder”, you can…

– ruthlessly eradicate rude or incompetent drivers who get in your way
scale Mt. Everest and drive through the Great Wall of China
run over the Incredible Hulk or the Michelin Man
– casually shrug off the RPGs aimed at you by envious neighbors
– embark on a single-handed conquest of Europe
– make Bruce Wayne cry when you flatten his “Batmobile”
crush cars who block you in at the Walmart parking lot
– fearlessly hit careless pedestrians and never even feel a bump
– safely chauffer enterprising Hobbits to their destinations regardless of orcs, ring-wraiths, or creepy flaming eyeballs

And that’s just for starters.

Don’t believe me? Fine. Go ahead and play Doubting Thomas. But first, watch this video. Satisfied? Good. Now go away while I save up for my truck.

(Many thanks to CG for the video – you have fine tastes.)

21 thoughts on “Forget the Hummer… I Want the Marauder”

  1. HAHA!!! Ok, you totally had me chuckling over the ‘what you can do with it….’ part! Way too funny. I am actually looking at that going, ‘cool!’… But then, I guess we all know I’m a little weird… lol!
    Oh, and I am NOT showing this to Josh, or we’d all be in BIG trouble (in more ways than one! haha!)

    1. That part was meant to be funny, though my tongue was firmly planted in my cheek for most of the list. :)

      (Psst… I don’t really advocate the slaughter of pedestrians.) :)

      1. My favorite was smashing the batmobile… ha! So, I hadn’t watched the video when I first commented… I totally LOVED it!!! Way too cool. My favorite parts are when people just stand there looking at it… or the guy with the shopping cart in the alley way.

        Are you sure?? lol!!!!!

  2. Pardon me while I attempt to refrain from salivating. That truck is really, really, really awesome. Time to transport some hobbits the American way, baby! :-)

  3. I watched the video. Think I could handle one of those.! ! ! Quite a video. Yes, it made me laugh. Just what I need these days. Especially at 2:00 in the morning. Thank you for
    the post.

  4. Thanks for sharing that. Unfortunately, I think that your trip to Mordor would be cut short by slashed tires, what with the orcs and nazgul favoring bladed weapons.

    Good video. “That gap’s large enough.” *smash* “Well, now it is.”

    1. “Unfortunately, I think that your trip to Mordor would be cut short by slashed tires, what with the orcs and nazgul favoring bladed weapons.”

      Aha! That’s where the machine guns come in handy! ;)

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