Earlier today, blogger Tim Challies linked to a list of twenty-five hilarious analogies, as compiled by high school English teachers. I just had to share it. You can read the full post by clicking here. For now, here are a few of my favorites:
“Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.”
“From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you’re on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.”
“The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.”
“Even in his last years, Granddad had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long it had rusted shut.”
“Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.”
In Chapter 2 of his new book The Next Story, Tim Challies writes about the changes wrought by the invention of the telegraph:
Gone was the idea of news as “functional information”. Very quickly arose the notion of news as entertainment. Instead of newspapers filled with in-depth analyses of local affairs, consumers demanded papers filled with interesting but irrelevant snippets of information, often from faraway places. “News from nowhere, addressed to no one in particular” gave people much to talk about but little to act on. It entertained and outraged, but demanded no response, no action. Neil Postman writes about the great loop of impotence this created: “The news elicits from you a variety of opinions about which you can do nothing except offer them as more news, about which you can do nothing.” People knew lots of facts, but had intimate knowledge of very little. Their knowledge about the world far surpassed their knowledge of the world.
Let us, as Christians, diligently guard against becoming mere know-it-all know-nothings. In both worldly and spiritual affairs, our goal should not be to gather vast amounts of trivia: an entire reservoir of trivial information is not worth an ounce of real, genuine thought – the kind of thought that produces action.
Shallow thinking will never take you anyplace worth going.
In the words of John Piper, “You don’t need to know a lot of things for your life to make a difference; but you do need to know a few great things, and you need to live for them with all your might.”
(This topic reminds me of yet another quote, this time from Ray Bradbury’s sci-fi classic Fahrenheit 451. Read it here.)
“When we give our lives over to idols, we hand them the keys to our hearts. We become ‘possessed’ by them, driven to use them, please them, and find our satisfaction in them. We become the tools of our tools; rather than owning our gadgets, we become owned by them. We begin to structure our lives around them, and our actions and choices are motivated by our need and desire for them blessings and benefits that idol provides for us.
“Idols hide from us to avoid direct confrontation. And one of the ways they hide is by convincing us that they are actually good things in our lives. What makes this such an effective strategy is that many of the things that become idols in our hearts really are good gifts from God. But somehow they have become twisted and perverted into something evil.”
~ Tim Challies, The Next Story (Chapter 1, pg. 29)