Txtng Tlkn

Ina hol n d ground der livD a hbbt. nt a nsty, drty, wet hol, filD W d ends of wrms n an oozy smel, nor yt a dry, bare, sndy hol W Ø n it 2 sit dwn on or 2 e@: twas a hbbt-hol, n dat means cmfrt.

What’s that? You say you’ve absolutely no idea what I just wrote? Dash it, man! Don’t you recognize the opening paragraph of The Hobbit? What were you raised on, the Hardy Boys? People these days…

What’s that? You say that what I wrote is most emphatically not the first paragraph of Tolkien’s famous work? Well of course it is, you antediluvian clod! I just translated it into texting lingo!

What’s that? You say you want me to write in plain, honest-to-goodness English? Golly, how old-fashioned you are! But I suppose if I must…

In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit. Not a nasty, dirty, wet hole, filled with the ends of worms and an oozy smell, nor yet a dry, bare, sandy hole with nothing in it to sit down on or to eat: it was a hobbit-hole, and that means comfort.

Satisfied, you traditionalist primate? Now my fingers are aching because I had to type out all those extra vowels! Thnx a lot!

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29 thoughts on “Txtng Tlkn”

  1. Haha My children are gone for the weekend, and I have been texting them…..and wearing out my fingers. I have such a struggle typing in text lingo. I absolutely could not spell “your or you’re” as “ur” when I texted Caleb. I mean, school does start Wednesday, and how would it look if the teacher can’t even spell???!!! Arrrggghhh Blast you, Text Lingo!! You are wreaking havoc on my social ife – now how would that look in text lingo??

  2. ifn i cudnt read tht is smthn wrng?

    Seriously, though, that is funny… I hate trying to minimize my words to fit into a single text that doesn’t take hours to create… Not to mention that if you DARE to put in periods and commas… well, you’ve got another thing coming.

  3. Haha, as mom said, we have been texting a lot. :) So funny that you did that right now. Texting is nice so long as you can talk correctly the rest of the time…..

    May I mention that I was really offended that you had to use the “Hobbit” for your txtng mssge. You really could have picked another book…… :D

  4. I couldn’t read it until I saw the first few words of the translation *cough* er, um… English, and then I figured out the rest. Occasionally I’ll use some short cuts, but definitely not the whole lingo. Once I use “u” when texting Curtis and he harassed me for that. :p “YOu know, it’s only two more letters.” Leaves you with a “are you really _that_ lazy?” kind of feeling….. =D

  5. I’m sometimes guilty as charged…especially with the “u.” Now Marissa has made me feel lazy. But, you know, my dear son, that I only speak the Queen’s English. :)

    Loved this very creative post, but I love you more. And, yes, since I’m the Mom, I can say super sweet stuff like that.

  6. Grandson, you make me laugh. Looks to me (at least for me.!!) I could write it out faster without
    trying to using all that “lingo”. U R amazing.

  7. Okay, so I got through the first line alright but the rest of it slowly went over my head…I gave up and read the translation.
    Texting just isn’t my thing. It takes too much brain power to think of short cuts.
    Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
    Jessica

    1. “It takes too much brain power to think of short cuts.”

      Haha! Yeah, I spend so much time trying to figure out how to abbreviate a word that I finally give up and spell the right way.

      Thanks for stopping by! :)

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